she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
