Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize