Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Randomize
