I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
