that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I lost the right to judge tonight
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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