She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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