why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
