6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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