How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize