we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
