Having a random hookup so left but love u
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
