I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
