there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
