she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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