I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
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