scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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