How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
