weddingsv make me drug and hornr
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize