Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
