Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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