508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Pants are for mortals
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
