yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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