You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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