Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
