I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
