yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He has the fingertips of a God
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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