ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
