Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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