Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
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