So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
