Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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