i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
