we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I would fuck him just for his dog
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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