Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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