I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
