dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
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