need another drink. this is the easiest way
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
false alarm, still single
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