pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
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