She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
