So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
