i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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