Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
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