So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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