i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
