I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize