Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
bring money and cleavage
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize