Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
