No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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