I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize