I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Randomize
