I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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