I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I bet he comes in French.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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